The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines

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1 Overview

To insure more responsible parenting and to promote the healthy adjustment and growth of a child each parent should recognize and address a child's basic needs:. To know that the parents' decision to live apart is not the child's fault. To develop and maintain an independent relationship with each parent and to have the continuing care and guidance from each parent. To be free from having to side with either parent and to be free from conflict between the parents.

To have a relaxed, secure relationship with each parent without being placed in a position to manipulate one parent against the other. To enjoy regular and consistent time with each parent. To be financially supported by each parent, regardless of how much time each parent spends with the child.

To be physically safe and adequately supervised when in the care of each parent and to have a stable, consistent and responsible child care arrangement when not supervised by a parent. To develop and maintain meaningful relationships with other significant adults grandparents, stepparents and other relatives as long as these relationships do not interfere with or replace the child's primary relationship with the parents.

Many of the guidelines are followed by a commentary further explaining the guideline or setting forth the child centered philosophy behind the guideline. The commentary is not an enforceable rule but provides guidance in applying the guideline.

Grade Level Information

Minimum Time Concept. The concept that these Guidelines represent the minimum time a non-custodial parent should spend with a child when the parties are unable to reach their own agreement. These guidelines should not be interpreted as a limitation of time imposed by the court. They are not meant to foreclose the parents from agreeing to, or the court from granting, such additional or reduced parenting time as may be in the best interest of the child in any given case.

In addressing all parenting time issues, both parents should exercise sensibility, flexibility and reasonableness. Parenting Time Plans or Calendars. It will often be helpful for the parents to actually create a year-long parenting time calendar or schedules. This may include a calendar in which the parties have charted an entire year of parenting time.

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Forecasting a year ahead helps the parents anticipate and plan for holidays, birthdays, and school vacations. The parenting time calendar may include agreed upon deviations from the Guidelines, which recognize the specialized needs of the children and parents. These Guidelines are applicable to all child custody situations, including paternity cases and cases involving joint legal custody where one person has primary physical custody.

However, they are not applicable to situations involving family violence, substance abuse, risk of flight with a child, or any other circumstances the court reasonably believes endanger the child's physical health or safety, or significantly impair the child's emotional development. In such cases one or both parents may have legal, psychological, substance abuse or emotional problems that may need to be addressed before these Guidelines can be employed.

The type of help that is needed in such cases is beyond the scope of these Guidelines. Existing parenting time orders on the date of adoption of these amendments shall be enforced according to the parenting time guidelines that were in effect on the date the parenting time order was issued. Changes to the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines do not alone constitute good cause for amendment of an existing parenting time order; however, a court or parties to a proceeding may refer to these guidelines in making changes to a parenting time order after the effective date of the guidelines.

Parents may agree to some or all of the changes to the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines and should be specific in their written agreement. There is a presumption that the Indiana Parenting Time Guidelines are applicable in all cases. Deviations from these Guidelines by either the parties or the court that result in parenting time less than the minimum time set forth below must be accompanied by a written explanation indicating why the deviation is necessary or appropriate in the case.

A court is not required to give a written explanation as to why a parent is awarded more time with the child than the minimum in these guidelines. The written explanation need not be as formal as Findings of Fact and Conclusions of Law; however, it must state the reason s for the deviation. Between Parents. Parents shall at all times keep each other advised of their home and work addresses, telephone numbers and email addresses.

Notice of any change in this information shall be given to the other parent in writing.


All communications concerning a child shall be conducted between the parents. Any communication shall occur at reasonable times and places unless circumstances require otherwise.

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A child shall not be used to exchange documents or financial information between parents. With A Child Generally. A child and a parent shall be entitled to private communications without interference from the other parent. A child shall never be used by one parent to spy or report on the other.

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Each parent shall encourage the child to respect and love the other parent. Parents shall at all times avoid speaking negatively about each other in or near the presence of the child, and they shall firmly discourage such conduct by relatives or friends.

With A Child By Telephone. Both parents shall have reasonable phone access to their child. Telephone communication with the child by either parent to the residence where the child is located shall be conducted at reasonable hours, shall be of reasonable duration, and at reasonable intervals, without interference from the other parent. If a parent uses an answering machine, voice mail or a pager, messages left for a child shall be promptly communicated to the child and the call returned. Parents should agree on a specified time for telephone calls so that a child will be available to receive the call.

The parent initiating the call should bear the expense of the call. A child may, of course, call either parent, though at reasonable hours, frequencies, and at the cost of the parent called if it is a long distance call. Examples of unacceptable interference with communication include a parent refusing to answer a phone or refusing to allow the child or others to answer; a parent recording phone conversations between the other parent and the child; turning off the phone or using a call blocking mechanism or otherwise denying the other parent telephone contact with the child.

With A Child By Mail. A parent and a child shall have a right to communicate privately by e-mail and faxes, and by cards, letters, and packages, without interference by the other parent. A parent should not impose obstacles to mail communications. For example, if a custodial parent has a rural address, the parent should maintain a mailbox to receive mail at that address.

A parent who receives a communication for a child shall promptly deliver it to the child. Electronic Communication. The same provisions above apply to electronic communications of any kind. Emergency Notification. For emergency notification purposes, whenever a child travels out of the area with either parent, one of the following shall be provided to the other parent: An itinerary of travel dates, destinations, and places where the child or the traveling parent can be reached, or the name and telephone number of an available third person who knows where the child or parent may be located.

Communication between parent and child. Each parent is encouraged to promote a positive relationship between the children and the other parent. It is important, therefore, that communication remain open, positive and frequent. No person shall block reasonable phone or other communication access between a parent and child or monitor such communications.

Both parents shall promptly provide the other parent with updated cell and landline phone numbers and e-mail addresses when there has been a change. It is important for a child to have as much contact with both parents as possible. Attempts to block access to and contact with the other parent may violate these parenting time guidelines. These types of behaviors may lead to sanctions, a change of parenting time, or in some cases, a change of custody. The prohibition applies equally to both parents. Transportation Responsibilities.

Unless otherwise agreed between the parents, the parent receiving the child shall provide transportation for the child at the start of the scheduled parenting time and the other parent shall provide transportation for the child at the end of the scheduled parenting time.

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Presence Of Both Parents. Both parents should be present at the time of the exchange and should make every reasonable effort to personally transport the child. On those occasions when a parent is unable to be present at the time of the exchange or it becomes necessary for the child to be transported by someone other than a parent, this should be communicated to the other parent in advance if possible.

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In such cases, the person present at the exchange, or transporting the child, should be a responsible adult with whom the child is familiar and comfortable. Where the distance between the parents' residences is such that extended driving time is necessary, the parents should agree on a location for the exchange of the child.

The cost of transportation should be shared based on consideration of various factors, including the distance involved, the financial resources of the parents, the reason why the distances exist, and the family situation of each parent at that time. Parental Hostility. In a situation where hostility between parents makes it impracticable to exchange a child at the parents' residences, the exchange of the child should take place at a neutral site.

Each parent shall have the child ready for exchange at the beginning and at the end of the scheduled parenting time and shall be on time in picking up and returning the child. The parents shall communicate as early as possible regarding any situation that would interfere with the timely exchange of the child.

Both parents have a duty to communicate any time the exchange is delayed. When no communication is initiated by the delaying parent, and pick up or return of a child does not occur within a reasonable time, the time and conditions of the exchange may be rescheduled at a time and place convenient to the parent not responsible for the delay. Parents should make every effort to pick up and return a child at the agreed time, and not substantially earlier or later.

Parents should recognize, however, that circumstances occur that require leeway in the scheduled times. What constitutes unreasonable time is fact sensitive. Parents are encouraged to include in their parenting plans what constitutes an unreasonable time. The custodial parent shall send an appropriate and adequate supply of clean clothing with the child and the non-custodial parent shall return such clothing in a clean condition. Each parent shall advise the other, as far in advance as possible, of any special activities so that the appropriate clothing may be available to the child.

It is the responsibility of both parents to ensure their child is properly clothed. The non-custodial parent may wish to have a basic supply of clothing available for the child at his or her home.

The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines
The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines
The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines
The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines
The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines
The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines The Pick Up Lines Handbook: An Introduction to Pick Up Lines and Routines

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